Well either ive not had long enough break or this whizz is shit and has given me little else but a thumping head ache ahhhhh.
i am...i dunno where i am wiv things.Weight wize 159 which altho still hidious is better then i was by 13 llb
and im not gaining altho eaten badly.Which shows a 2 week of hardcore restriction and i could be back under 150- i just need the motivation to do it!
Done nothing for the past 5 days but feel ill,smoke weed, read,audiobook,sleep,eat and pick my poor sore scalp.
The real story of me and my E.D. The stuff no one knows. Food Diary Not pro ana but not pro recovey either. My bipolar life and unquiet mind. Perscribed and non prescribed drugs
Wednesday, 27 July 2011
Monday, 18 July 2011
Weekend.....
Did nothing but sleep for most of it-which sounds like a bad thing but was fantastic! i needed it. Was gonna go out for birthday drinkx but he weather was shit and neither Sleekit or i felt up to it.Did eat and sure i was around 1500 yesterday.sat was less. Weighed today: 161.2 so slowly loosing-taking forever tho.........
Mondays ok so far not much done today due to appointments. The boy was sick at school today so will be home tomoz and i was hoping to do things...oh well guess it will be a housework day, SIGH
Friday, 15 July 2011
Calorie intake 10/7/11-15/7/11
CAL INTAKE:
Monday: 1300- Fat Pig!
Tuesday: 837- Not Bad
Wednesday 800- Not Bad
Thursday: 0 -!YAY! Perfect
Friday: 500- Good
Monday: 1300- Fat Pig!
Tuesday: 837- Not Bad
Wednesday 800- Not Bad
Thursday: 0 -!YAY! Perfect
Friday: 500- Good
wanna sleep
So today fri was a slower day. Didnt get to sllep till two tursday eve so felt rough when alam went. Took boy to school but didnt take my normal am whizz. Decided instead to get a samwhich (as no calintake the preavious day) and a latte and then got a few precious hours catch up sleep untill i picked the boy up.Then i did a bomb,had shower and met sleekit and the girls and took the kids to the park
She also had bought some of this new gear and agreed with me that it was pretty shit.St jimmy maintains he has been high as a kite on it but i suspect this is because he has free acess and can take as much as he wants.I hope he does....sooner its gone the sooner we can get some decent shit! LOL
Taken more then i normally would today partly to see if Quantity has any effect on quality( Answer: not much) and also in the massive sort out i discovered that there is an urgent, complicated £ problem i hgave to sort and there is a dead line thats fast aproching so i thought id crack it tonight.i have done some but the whizz is so weak even tho i took some a few hours ago i want to sleep!....And eat-and i already had about 500 today!
Thursday, 14 July 2011
goingz on
So yesterday after a slow start in the morning, owing to St Jimmy popping in, i got most things on the list id made first thing done and finished them off today.
Accomplished:
school runs

baths
cleaned kitchen
Washing
hoovered bedroom
changed beds
put away clothes and reorganized closet
organzied and put away dressing table
organized and put away bedside dresser
Reasearched,composed,printed and sent letter to socail services requesting my files.
Made appointment at futures training to continue assesment
Got to appointment with c.p.n
under 1000 cals.
sorted lots of piles of various crap in the house
Food wize not too bad yesterday 800 or so.Will try do better today.Had lost a lb when i got on the scales tho!Feel bad about not going to the gym but i am frightened of going while on the whizz.I dont think my heart could take it and everyone i ask,even real whiz freaks tell me to stear clear so i am for now.Saying that i might need a br8 from the whiz for a few days as i'm needing more now- or it could be that this new stuff is shit. I was under the impression the only reason u needed a br8 was to sleep! i don't know if im hoping to sleep tonight or not.If i don't it means A) the gears not shit and B) this is the best night to do it up tonight. come down in the day( best time for me) sleep fri night and sat and be refreshed for my birthday Sunday eve. However if i can keep this weird but wonderful 1 bomb in the am,work it off, sleep like a babe thing going i would be stupid not to. Hmmmm the jury is still out.......
Tomorrow im meeting sleekit and the girls and we are all going to the park because ive done nothing with the boy so far this week. Have more things on a ''should do'' list but really sick of doin things that just need to be done and never doing anything i wanna do,you know for fun?Also have the problem of what do i want to do thats afordable?
Wednesday, 13 July 2011
Must Do Better.......
Must do better, Must push harder!
Firstly on the weight and food.I ate yesterday,dispite the whizz.Its unusal to say the least but on the up side i was assleep at a reasonable time.I need not of eaten so much tho! lost half a lb , if that!
Hoping also, to have a more productive day today and get more done.Yesterday i wasted alot of time on the computer-on here, facebook, prettythin, youtube and photobucket!
So i found an i dea on drug forum i visit about how to use my whizz more effectively:
1. Makes a list of all projects/chores/errands for the day.
2. Writes in parenthesis the longest each should possibly take anyone.
3. Highlight/circle the "MUST DO" items. This lets SWIM feel free to drop the other items on the list mid-completion for the defined more crucial task.
4. At end of day, make list of things SWIM found he *wanted* to take on as side-projects but had no time for. These end up almost as weekend hobbies, as they are almost always things (like the home theater) that are both constructive and relaxing, but not urgent.
Read more: http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=118539#ixzz1RyRbeG20
2. Writes in parenthesis the longest each should possibly take anyone.
3. Highlight/circle the "MUST DO" items. This lets SWIM feel free to drop the other items on the list mid-completion for the defined more crucial task.
4. At end of day, make list of things SWIM found he *wanted* to take on as side-projects but had no time for. These end up almost as weekend hobbies, as they are almost always things (like the home theater) that are both constructive and relaxing, but not urgent.
Read more: http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=118539#ixzz1RyRbeG20
Im now giving myself from 9-30-11am to come up with my list,check email,facebook and post here then be productive untill school run 2;15-245.Will aloow my self back on the computer 3-4 and then again after six.I hope using this method will have my ''accomplished today'' list will be more impressive.
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